Say Yes and Watch Your Life Change

*This transcript was auto-generated*

Introduction:

This is The Kim Gravel Show!

Kim:

The thing you're probably getting criticized for the most is probably the thing that's your biggest gift. I'm a hot mess. I don't have any balance at all. Like, I'm either eating twelve crispy creams or broccoli and carrots.

Zac:

One of the most vulnerable moments I've ever seen from you, Kim.

Kim:

Some of you have had so much life experience. What in the world are you being prepared for? It must be something really, really impactful.

Zac:

What were you feeling in that moment?

Kim:

Fear. But let me give you a piece of realistic, applicable advice.

Zac:

All right, introduce us there. Because we were not planning to do a show. We were.

Kim:

We were waiting on a guest.

Zac:

We're waiting for a guest to show up and listen.

Kim:

Things happen. So you have to pivot. Like, I was out here, like, looking at my book, and it says, when things don't go your way or you fail, it's time to pivot. So we're pivoting.

Zac:

Here we go. We're pivoting.

Kim:

And you were talking. We were talking about the last episode, and we had a lot of engagement, and I said, well, let's comment on the comments. So this is random. I've never seen these comments. Pull them up. Cause you were gonna pull them up. You showed me a couple of them.

Zac:

Yeah. And then I said, oh, my gosh, kid, we have to record this.

Kim:

Yeah, so we stopped recording. I love to hear from you. So that's what I'm saying. Like, I mean, look, and there's a lot of people that don't like me and don't get me, and I'm cool with that. I love you anyway. I don't care. Cause, look, I'm very opinionated, and I've lived a lot of life to be opinionated. And some of my opinions are right.

Kim:

They might be wrong, but they're mine. So you're right. There we go. And you're entitled to yours, too. And that's what I love. So let's pull them up. Let's comment on the comments.

Zac:

Okay, let's comment on the comments.

Kim:

So I wanna hear what you have to say. Cause everybody knows what I have to say. Yes. Thank you.

Zac:

This is the audience talking back to me. And Kim, you better not interrupt me, because we have a comment about that already. I'm gonna start with that one. That'll surprise me. Kim.

Kim:

Zac, you are dying to start with that one.

Zac:

This is my favorite comment we got. So this is the last episode that just came out. And when we actually put this out. It won't be the last episode, but this is the one called. That was your solo episode. Tell them what the episode was about before we get into it.

Kim:

It was about the change, making changes. Right. And how change is inevitable and how it's. How you handle the change. It's just like opportunity. You have opportunities, but a lot of you don't. A lot of us don't see them when they're in front of us. Change is happening.

Kim:

What are you doing with change? Change is going to happen.

Zac:

Yes.

Kim:

So how you do you deal with it in default? You just let life happen to you? Or do you. You know, I mean, I give you all the. I laid it out.

Zac:

I love this episode. And I was saying, he's got a lot of engagement. More engagement than we've been getting in the past. So we were starting to read these as we were waiting. This is my favorite one. Someone on YouTube, so this is all from YouTube, wrote, give Zac a chance to speak, please. You interrupt too often. And you know what?

Kim:

Who said it? Who said it?

Zac:

Thank you. Sal ul seven. Salut.

Kim:

Seven. Salyul seven. You're absolutely right. 100%. Can't deny it.

Zac:

You know what, though? Let me say this as the producer of this show. It's called The Kim Gravel Show for a reason. No, it's not the Kim and Zac show. It's the Kim show.

Kim:

I'm not gonna interrupt you. I'm letting you finish it. I'm letting you finish. Cause I'll say this, the reason I interrupt y'all. And this is true. It's not that I wanna talk more than Zac. I won't be able to remember what I was getting ready to say.

Zac:

That is a hundred.

Kim:

Am I right, Zac? I'm not defending my rudeness without interrupting you, Kim.

Zac:

This is hard to not interrupt, by the way.

Kim:

Yeah.

Zac:

Whenever I interrupt Kim, and then this stuff always gets cut out. Right? Because then I'll sit. Kim will say something, and then I'll say something, and maybe I'll go on a tear, and I'll talk for a minute, and then we'll come back and be like, yeah, what were you saying, Kim? And she'll. You'll be like, I have no idea.

Kim:

I don't remember nothing.

Zac:

What do we even. What do we even do in here anymore? It was. That is so funny.

Kim:

But I will say that's a fair comment. That's a fair comment. I will take that. Constructive criticism.

Zac:

Yeah, but like, I. And in your defense, there is no defensive. I shouldn't be talking that much. I just don't think I should.

Kim:

That's not true. Zac, go on to the next comment.

Zac:

Let's say, oh, someone wrote God's honest truth. Two exclamation points. No plan works out how you planned.

Kim:

No, but it doesn't. It really doesn't. But you. I always tell my kids this, make a plan and then be flexible. You know, I mean, it's just. It's the truth. Like, you can't be aimless. I said this on the episode.

Kim:

Go watch it. Go ahead. Go to the next comment.

Zac:

Yeah, go watch it. Go watch it. All right, wait, this next one, I'm just literally reading these in order. We did not plan to do this. I did not curate these.

Kim:

I have no idea.

Zac:

So Nancy Brown, 1975, wrote, and she was commenting on the beginning of the episode where you're talking about your kid stealing your Airpods all the time. She wrote, get one extra of everything you will need to. And then it all caps, hide it. You must hide it from them. You have to remember, they will do this again. So sorry they panicked you. That is hilarious. Okay, that's a mom.

Kim:

First of all, that is a. We are sisters. I get you. I feel you. What's the name of this comment?

Zac:

Who's Nancy Brown?

Kim:

Nancy Brown. I have four or five deep, honey. Not just one extra. Cause keep in mind, I have Travis, Bo, and Blanton, and they each pilfer, they're each taking all the time. So one backup is not enough.

Zac:

Yep. Well, and you have to get better at hiding them, it turns out. I think that's the key.

Kim:

Let me tell you then, Nancy, I won't be able to remember where I hit them to begin with. Okay, this is a true story. So I bought a box of Krispy Kreme donuts. I feel like I'm in a confessional, but here we go. I bought a box of Krispy Kreme donuts. And I know whatever people say, they've got, like, airplane jet fuel on them as a glaze. I don't care. I love them.

Zac:

Yeah. Okay.

Kim:

I bought a box of. It was six, three glaze, three chocolate. I'm starving right now.

Zac:

Okay. Yep.

Kim:

I hid them. I ate a couple.

Zac:

Uh huh.

Kim:

And then I hid them.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Why was, like, two nights ago, I think it was like Monday night, I was going through my house. Like I had just lost, you know, my best friend, trying to find that. I cannot find them. I have no idea where I've put them. I was, like, 20 minutes into these donuts trying to find them.

Zac:

Isn't it funny when you get 20 minutes into something like that and then you're like, what am I even doing? Like, I could have gone to the store, bought more donuts, gotten back, right?

Kim:

But the fact that I couldn't find them made me want them more. It just goes to show you, I tell this to young girls all the time. Men, people want what they can't have. You tell me, that's all you gotta do.

Zac:

That's a very different place.

Kim:

This is the truth. I told this little girl, I spoke at this little glamor and grace club at the school. And I go in and tell them and I make them stand up and tell me two things about themselves. We should do that here, right now. Everybody listening. I always say this to the girls. I say, I want you to stand up, state your name, what grade you in. But for you at home, I say, how old are you? I want you to name one thing that's beautiful about you on the inside and one beautiful thing about you on the outside.

Kim:

And it's so funny because everybody can always answer the inside, but they have a hard time answering the outside. And so I get to really look at them and say, oh, my gosh, it's your eyes, it's your face, it's your cheekbones. I get to really, you know, be that mirror for them where they can't look in the mirror and can't see what is so beautiful about them on the outside. I don't know. Why? What were we talking about?

Zac:

Kim, name one thing that's beautiful about you on the inside and on the outside.

Kim:

Okay. Oh, you're flipping the script on me?

Zac:

I'm flipping the script on you.

Kim:

I think one thing about myself that's beautiful on the inside is my edification, my encouragement, my ability to really see the. Not just the best in people and not just the potential, the reality of who they were created to be.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

And I think on the outside, although they may be bloodshot, my eyes.

Zac:

Yeah, you do. Your eyes like, I love my eyes.

Kim:

I got my granddaddy's eyes.

Zac:

Yeah. They are so blue.

Kim:

I used to want to change my eye color to be brown. Uh huh. And I used to wanna be a brunette, like a really dark brunette. And have. Because, like, you know, brooke, she. I mean, I could go on and on. So many of the girls growing up, just that girl next door with the long brown hair and the brown eyes. Say, hello, cheerleader.

Kim:

I was a short. I mean, I was a short haired, gangly, you know, super, super awkward viola player in the orchestra. So there you go.

Zac:

You played viola. I didn't know that.

Kim:

I did. I was in the orchestra.

Zac:

Were you any good?

Kim:

No, I didn't practice. The reason I played viola, because it was different.

Zac:

Did you ever play viola in a beauty pageant? Like, as your talent?

Kim:

No, honey. It'd be like. No.

Zac:

Was it always singing? Were you always the singer?

Kim:

Oh, yeah. Yes, honey. I used to sing all the time. Used to. Lace want to be Whitney, I'm just telling you, like. Like, it was like that last episode, that change episode, and just, like, what I tell my kids, you know? You know? I mean, I would. Okay, Zac, would you say that I'm a nice person? Like, would you say, kim is so nice? Would that be an adjective? You would lead with the top five?

Zac:

Let's say top five. That's putting me quite on the spot.

Kim:

But I want you to tell the truth.

Zac:

So here. Okay. This is what I would say.

Kim:

No, no, go back. I got a yes or no. Tell the truth.

Zac:

Are you a nice person?

Kim:

Would you say, oh, my gosh, Kim is so nice. Would you lead with that?

Zac:

I don't know if I'd lead with that, but I would not lead that. If I had to either say yes or no to that, I would say yes.

Kim:

I'm not asking you that.

Zac:

Okay.

Kim:

I'm not asking you that.

Zac:

I said no. No, I wouldn't lead with it.

Kim:

You wouldn't lead with it? No. What would you lead with?

Zac:

I would say. What I would lead with is that Kim's got my back. Like that. That, to me, I think, like, so, for me, the thing that I know for sure is that I will never be in a situation, like, working with you. Working for you where, like, you stabbed me in the back. Right. I just know that is not who you are. You would never do that?

Kim:

I would never do that to anybody.

Zac:

No, I know you would never do. So. That's just not how you operate. You are not the, like, business person who you're, like, kind of keeping a side eye on or whatever.

Kim:

Like that.

Zac:

You know what? I. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Kim:

Like, you're doing like that.

Zac:

Cause, like, you don't do people. You don't do people dirty. And that's. And that, I think, is, like, as, like, someone that works with you day in and day out and knows you really well. And that, to me, is, like, so, like, knowing that about you is so important and.

Kim:

Well, I appreciate that, but. And I also will shoot you straight down the barrel.

Zac:

Yes. Yes. And you will tell it to me totally straight. And you will straight down the barrel if something gets messed up or something. Yeah. Yeah, totally. And that's good. I love that.

Kim:

Well, that's why we worked. But I will tell you something that did not always serve me. My point to you listening is it's not about me. What I'm talking about is the things that make people so people, like, say, oh, Kim, you're so nice and sweet. I'm like, no, I'm not. No, I'm not. I am not. I can edify.

Kim:

I can see you.

Zac:

But you, I can see you empathetic. You're empathetic. Just to interrupt you for a second.

Kim:

I'm empathetic because I am a broken, broke down, Rick rack, patty whack, give a dog a bone, human being. How are you? And let me. Oh, God. How am I not broken? I mean, how. I mean, I actually.

Zac:

I'm really one of the most interesting things you've said in a while on this show.

Kim:

Oh, God, I'm just a mess. I'm a hot mess.

Zac:

You were telling me earlier you don't have any work life balance.

Kim:

I don't have any balance at all. Like, I'm either eating twelve Krispy Kremes or I am, like, you know, broccoli and, like, carrots. I mean, I'm just. There's no balance in my life, which is not good. So you know what I look for? I look for people like you. I look for people like my husband. I look for people like Amy, who can. Who I can never have what they have, but I can watch y'all.

Kim:

Like, I'm a people person. So, like, I love to sit and, like, being around you, Zac, makes me, like, oh, my God, it's gonna be great.

Zac:

Well, you're a person of extremes. You will go extreme. I am for whatever is, like, in front of you. Right.

Kim:

But okay. Okay. Yeah. It's fair. And I want to talk because I want to apply this to your life, who is listening to me right now. So what is that one thing? Like, you're an overthinker. You're in your head.

Zac:

Yep.

Kim:

It is the best thing about you and can be, if not balanced, the worst thing about you. So the perfect person for you to be working with is me? Cause I don't think.

Zac:

Yeah. Cause I don't think. Kim, you have, like, a massive, massive business. Multiple brands.

Kim:

No, no, no. But I'm just saying, like. But I move from intuitiveness. I move from that. So you move from but do you see how we're all supposed to be working together? Somebody listening here, thinking, I'm not enough. I can't do this. And I get. The thing you're probably getting criticized for the most is probably the thing that's your biggest gift.

Kim:

Oh, okay.

Zac:

Wait, wait, wait. What? So. But that's not true. Of every possible thing. Wait, so give me an example of that.

Kim:

Pretty much every possible. Okay, give me a second. Pretty much. Let me clarify. Let me. Let me drill it down a little bit more. The thing that you don't like about yourself. The thing that you.

Kim:

Oh, how do I say. I want to make sure I say this right? Cause I wanna walk through it. Cause, you know, I'm off. I'm just. Now I'm just. This is. We're going.

Zac:

Yeah, this is off the cuffs. Yeah, this is totally off.

Kim:

Okay. Okay. Cock. Okay. The thing said. Kim, quit talking. You interrupt him too much. The thing that is so true, the thing that is my gift can also be that stumbling block.

Kim:

So the thing that you're overthinking, what'd you say your biggest struggle is for you, Zac?

Zac:

Oh, my biggest struggle. Okay. My biggest struggle, I think, is. I think it's. I think it is balance right now. I think it's balance with the family. I think, you know, especially now, we're going through a really hard time with the family. We've had a death in the family recently, and I think.

Kim:

You resonated with that.

Zac:

Yeah. But I think that it's like. It's hard to be, like, I really care about what I do. I want to do. Really? Yeah. I want to make the show great. I want to spend all the time it needs. I want to do all this.

Zac:

But I also have to be with my family now, and I have to do this. And it's hard. And it's hard to find the time, and it's. You know.

Kim:

But see, even you talking right now is telling me how much you're thinking about all of that.

Zac:

Yeah, no, I know. I overthink it. Yeah. What you wanted me to say. Cause I'm an overthinker, and I think you're right about that. I can overthink. You're right about that.

Kim:

To me, that is one of your biggest superpowers of all freaking time.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Like, you come to the most poignant. What's that word? Poignant.

Zac:

Poignant.

Kim:

Okay, smart.

Zac:

I mean, you know, to start.

Kim:

And just in micro detailed decision, where I just do a broad stroke and like, hey, let's hope for the best. Okay?

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Like, that's so for me, I'm always looking for people just like you. I'm like, you are my producer. Like, if I ever go on to do anything else, I'm like, Zac's coming with me. You know what I'm saying? Like, you get me. I get you. I want to encourage everybody that's listening. There's something that is your superpower. That's your gifting, that's your innate God given.

Kim:

He just touched you on the head. And that's what you can do, boo. And you've got to surround yourself with people who can fill in those gaps for you to get where you want to go. You cannot do this thing alone. Whatever the thing you want to do is, you can't do it alone.

Zac:

I want to go back to what you were just saying a second ago, because I still don't really understand how your biggest, like, the thing that you sort of, like, what do you say? Criticize yourself for the most is also your biggest strength. Like, if you. For a long time, I felt like. And you're going to think, this is so dumb, but I was like, man, I'm just lazy. Like, I'm lazy. Like, I'm not producing. This is before we met, right? Like, I went through a period in my life where I just felt kind of, like, lazy.

Kim:

That is so the opposite of you. That is totally opposite.

Zac:

I know. I'm such a. Try hard. I know. But, like, is that. I don't know. You tell me what kind of a. Give me an example of something.

Kim:

You just proved my point. You just proved my point. You said, I feel like I'm so lazy. That's the total. You're the total opposite of that.

Zac:

Right.

Kim:

So you probably should be a little bit more lazy.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

That's why you don't have balance. Boo. Boo. You just answered your own question. You don't. Hey, I need my check. I'm out. I need my counselor's fee.

Zac:

I hate that so much. I hate that so much.

Kim:

You just answered your own question. You just gave yourself the answer. You're not lazy. You're the opposite.

Zac:

You know what I'm going to give? I'm going to interrupt you. I'm going to say we're going to a commercial. I can't even. Right now.

Kim:

Okay, go to the commercial. We'll come back with more comments.

Zac:

You know, we'll have more of these comments.

Kim:

So. Okay, we're back. And Zac. Zac would not say that I am nice. Remember he said, no, I would not lead with that. I would not lead with you. That being lazy. There's no.

Kim:

When I tell you Zac is the polar opposite of being lazy. But that's what I'm saying. That superpower that we have, it trips us up. It trips us up because we think the things that come so easy to us. Do I over talk? Heck, yeah. But see, it used to be like, I used to be in my head going, I said too much. I shouldn't have said that. I was on live tv.

Kim:

I shouldn't said that. Maybe I hurt their feelings. Maybe I was too straightforward. Maybe I was too communicating too much. Maybe I overshared. Yeah. I overshare. Yeah.

Kim:

I say things I shouldn't say. Yes, that was inappropriate. Heck, yeah. But the things that I do share that connect and touch people outweigh, far outweigh that. So people get stuck in not doing what they are supposed to be put on this earth to do, not walking in their superpower, because they're hung up on things that, because they allow that fear of stumbling, of making mistakes of not of it truly, that's the biggest fear is I'm not going to do it. Right. I'm not going to do it well, and I'm not going to be validated.

Zac:

Right. Well, and that's what this episode was kind of about, right? I mean, it was like the change the things that are hard, like, live in it, right? Let it. Let it happen.

Kim:

And then you'll let it pass through you. And I will tell you, it never turns out like you think it's going to turn out, but it turns out if you allow it, right, what it needs to be. And then you're like, have you, how many times have you looked back and you were like, oh, my God, you know, and you think, oh, how's this going? Oh, my gosh. All things work together for those who love him. You know, I'm going to quote that. And also, all things work together for the good they do. I know it doesn't feel like that in this environment that we live in, but think about it. It all works out.

Kim:

Does tragedy happen? Does mistakes happen? Does trauma happen? Yeah. We live in a fallen world and we're flawed people. We're broken people. I'm so broken. I mean, the other day I was having a nervous breakdown.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

You know that I was talking to you about it.

Zac:

Well, you were talking to me about it, and I think, you know, but here's the thing. Can I just. I want to go back to a second cause I think there was one of the most important, I think, moments that I saw, like, one of the most vulnerable moments I've ever seen from you, Kim. And I'm gonna just. I'm just gonna throw this out there. The day before and the day of your book release.

Kim:

Oh, my gosh.

Zac:

When you were, like, frankly, a mess. Like, you were a total mess.

Kim:

I was miserable.

Zac:

You were so, like, I mean, I don't want to care.

Kim:

Why do you think that was? You know, tell the people how crazy I was. I mean, I almost wanted to, like, divorce Travis. Do you remember this?

Zac:

You were so angry at Travis because he threw. He was the one who basically, like, was the driving force behind this big book launch that we did. That was. That was on QVC Plus, and you can probably still go and stream it somewhere. You were so mad at him. I remember I was in Atlanta. I flew in to produce the show, and I remember your sister calling me, and it was like I was eating breakfast or something that morning that we.

Kim:

Were going to keep talking about it. Go ahead.

Zac:

And she was like, I don't know if Kim's going to come. I don't know if Kim's going to come. I don't know what we're going to do. I was like, okay, what could I do? We were, like, strategizing. Like, how can we get Kim to actually show up? And to your credit, like, you showed up. You showed up when you needed to, and you delivered, and it was great. Right?

Kim:

But again, do you remember?

Zac:

But it was a struggle, and I want to talk, like, why? Like, why? For you. Why? What were you feeling in that moment?

Kim:

Fear. And about 100% of you listening to this, that's what you move into, because fear grips you in a way no one can see and experience but you about you. Fear is a constant frenemy because it can serve you, but it also can paralyze you. And that's. I was afraid. Again, I'm going to go back to your biggest struggle, your biggest critique, your biggest flaw is, nine times out of ten, your biggest gift, and mine is communication. That's a big gift for me, and I know that, and I'm good with that. But when it's about you telling the world your story and your thing, and I was scared to death I would not be received well.

Zac:

And you were. Seemed to me like you were worried no one was gonna show up. Like, you were gonna be right. I mean, not. Not a real worry, but was that a worry? That seemed to me.

Kim:

I think it was a worry no, you didn't. It's like, three or four down. That was an excuse. That was. That was a. That was something to say to get. I really just is, like, I talk all the time, and I'm out on live tv all the time, and I do it with a. A host, or I do it with Zac, or I do it.

Kim:

This is just me on display, and am I good enough? And, no, I'm not. I'm really not. You will never be good enough in your own eyes. Go ahead and accept that. That's what I'm saying. This gift that you possess is hard on you. It's a burden. Success is a burden.

Kim:

You know, fame, burden, money, burden. It's a heavy load to carry. But the gift that you have, we need. So you got to carry that burden. You got to pick up that cross and walk with it, honey, because that's what we need. But see, that is why most people, I would say, I mean, there's so many people struggling. Zac. They're struggling with disease.

Kim:

They're struggling with emotional, mental health, relational. I mean, kids, aging parents fill in the blank. But if you will listen to a little piece of this and kind of just catch a bit of this perspective here, maybe, just maybe, that fear and that struggle and all of that that's coming at you right now, if we look at it through a different lens, have you ever thought maybe it's there to either point you in the right direction or strengthen you for what's coming? And I know that sounds cheeseball, and a lot of people are like, well, Kim, you don't know. I don't know. I don't know much of nothing, but I just know. Pain is pain. Struggle is struggle, but it can serve you if you'll let it, you know? And as I've gotten older, I I can handle that. Now, I will tell you, that was just a couple of years ago.

Kim:

So it was. It was. I mean, like, I'm not. I'm a mess. People don't understand. I'm a mess. I have high expectations. I have high expectations of myself and other people, and I think that's.

Kim:

That's great, and I think it's also horrible. But we gotta live somewhere in the middle of that. You've got to have the right perspective when it comes to that. I don't have a problem. People, including myself, having episodes or moments of just complete self doubt. We just can't stay there.

Zac:

How has that perspective changed over, like, as you've gotten older? Cause I know I'm really thinking about this message that it's just you're better as you age, right. And it's like you were successful later in life, really successful later in life. And you've always said to me, it happens when it happens. You need to be ready. And I'm mixing up a lot of ideas here in one. But I think I'd love to know, how is your perspective changed? How has your perspective changed as you've gotten older? And what is that unlocked for you?

Kim:

Well, success is not one plus one equals two. It's not a formula. Okay, so when you say. When I'm saying prepare for what's coming, the preparation is not, I'm going to school. I'm getting a degree. I'm doing this. I'm doing this formula. That's not success.

Kim:

That's a little bit of preparation. But real preparation is experience. And experience is not education. Education is knowing things. Experience is living them.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

And. And for some of us, some of you have had so much life experience, what in the world are you being prepared for? It must be something really, really impactful.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Okay, so, like, I've got. Okay, let me give you example. I've got a young friend. She's amazing, gifted esthetician. She gives me my facials right here in Auburn, Georgia. Henny, she is time rewind day spae. She's fantastic. And she is a powerhouse of a personality and gifting.

Kim:

And she is like a cat in a knapsack, okay.

Zac:

Clawing her way out.

Kim:

Okay, okay. Just like, just fighting, you know, trying to get out, trying to get more, trying to be more, trying to accomplish. Trying to be, you know, all of that.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

And I said to her one day, I said, honey, this is your preparation. I said, do you know how long I was preparing to launch my brands at 46? I've been doing it since it's been 19. Now, Zac, I'm not a mathematician. You're the smart one. Tell me how many years that is. 19. 2021. 22.

Zac:

That's 27 years.

Kim:

27 years. And she looked at me like, are you kidding me right now? I'm like, honey, you're being. You got to shift the way you're thinking. This is the preparation for what is coming. So just calm down, kitty cat. In that knapsack. Just calm on down and lay there. Let the sack open.

Kim:

And when it's time, you'll just crawl right on out of that thing and walk, right? All of that is how you look at it. So you say, how has your perspective changed over the years? Is that when the ports close. And I don't know if my product is getting here in time for the holiday season.

Zac:

You were saying that you got all sorts of stuff that's on a boat.

Kim:

It's on a boat, the middle of ocean, and ain't nobody gonna unpack it. Okay, how am I gonna change that? So I called my team. I said, what else we got? We gonna plug in beauty to these shows? We got some beauty into warehouse. Let's go. Like, every. My perspective has changed. It's no longer a crisis. It's no longer.

Kim:

It's just a shift of what we're looking at and how we're looking at it. And as I've gotten older, I have not perfect. I had to do that with my book launch. It's how I'm looking at things. And now it comes a little bit more easier to shift the way I look at it. Yeah, like. Cause, see, with our show, I see Zac, remember when I said, hang on, something's coming, and you say, kim, how do you know? Well, I'm intuitive, but also, I look at what's going on around me. Stop.

Kim:

And look at what's going around in your world. Is your computer dying? Every day is something happening to your kids where they're making mistakes? Every day is something happening to you. You get in a wreck, you hit a mailbox, and it's happening on a. That is. That is. That is your perspective. That is that. You got to look at what's happening and why it's happening and change the way you're looking at it.

Kim:

I'm telling you, we should have a true manifestation podcast. We really should.

Zac:

We should. Because manifestation is one of those things that I. That I still sort of really struggle with and that I think you're very good at.

Kim:

It's perspective. It all starts with what you're looking at and how you're looking at it. Okay. It starts with perspective. You can't have the manifestation talk if you don't know how to change the way you're looking at something.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Cause, like, perspective, too, is not. It's not just changing the way you're thinking about it. It's also changing what you're looking at, because you can look at a big old car. You can look at. Okay, say Mercedes Benz. You're going to buy Mercedes Benz. You can look at it like, oh, my gosh, this is like a Mercedes Benz. Look at the color.

Kim:

Look at this. Look at all the details. Look at this. And there could be one little thing wrong with the mirror.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

And like, my husband will look at the mirror and go, I'm not buying that. Look at that mirror. And I'd be like, oh, we can fix that mirror. That's nothing. Let's ask him for a $1,000 off and move on. I mean, you know, it's all in how you look at it every. And it's all in what you're looking at. I'm not looking at the mirror.

Kim:

I'm looking at the opportunity to get it for less.

Zac:

Right. The mirror is an opportunity to make a really good deal and then get what you want.

Kim:

That's a perspective.

Zac:

Yeah, good point. If the poor stays, never perfect, is that, you know. Yeah, yeah.

Kim:

If the port situation continues, this is not a problem. It's an opportunity for other people in business to insert their product that they ever got a shot before. Look at it like that.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

And that's not being positive. That's not being pocket. That's not, like, polypositive. That's.

Zac:

Wait, let's. Let's go back to some of these comments, because there's a good one here that I think will. Okay, like, you're. You're leading. You're gonna have a good response to this, I think. So. Someone wrote, and this is a very long username, so I'm not going to try to just go on YouTube and look at the comments. You can read it for yourself.

Zac:

Kim, your words are powerful. Change is great. I have a fear of speaking in front of people when I'm at church or in meetings, at work. Don't let a person ask me a question. I will forget what I know. I need to change that. God needs to change that fear for me.

Kim:

Mm. Well, he will. He'll change the fear for you. But let me give you a piece of realistic, applicable advice.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Truly, death and public speaking. And public speaking is the number one fear of the whole entire, like, universe. Death is number two. So people rather die than public speak. So you're not alone there, but clearly you have something to say. Cause if you're getting called on and if you're feeling the urge to speak, you know, you probably have something really good to say, and that's that fear is silencing you from making that impact when you are scared. So say somebody calls on you and you are scared to speak the first things out of your mouth. Say, hello, everyone.

Kim:

I'm scared to death to be up here right now. When you state or speak out, the thing that you're fearful of, it immediately connects with other people. Immediately. When communication is all about connection. Ain't nobody give two rips about what most people say anyway. It's, do I connect with what you're saying?

Zac:

Right? Do I feel that for myself?

Kim:

That's it. And when people understand and connect with you as a human being, because that's all we all crave. Remember. Remember the oxytocin? Remember that? Remember when we had the doctor on? People didn't even see that part of the interview. Remember that? They should. They didn't see about.

Zac:

Yeah. And you. And you really latched onto that. That's such a powerful idea. Huge.

Kim:

It's everything. That's all we want to do.

Zac:

Talk about that. Kim, what was it that you latched onto? Remind the viewers, for the folks and the listeners, for the folks who haven't.

Kim:

Well, we. We had a longevity doctor on who was talking about aging. Well, and I said, what is the number one thing to increase our longevity? I think it was our last rapid fire or something. And I said, what was the number one thing to increase our longevity? And she said, well, movement. She goes, but the number one thing is connection.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

And she went on to scientifically explain why. Cause it releases oxytocin. Oxytocin. Is that okay? So that comment that you just made on our YouTube channel about getting up to speak, the thing to get past that fear is to say the thing that's going to connect when you speak. So my advice to you is, if you are scared to death when you get up and say, look, I am scared to death to get up and speak, but what I have to say has to be said. When you say those things to a group of people, you are going to instantly have 100, 200, how many people? 50. How many people you're speaking to, you're going to have their connection because everybody can relate to that. That's a practical way.

Kim:

And then every time you do it, it will go, it will get. It will get less and less and less because it sounds like sister sledge. We need to hear what you have to say.

Zac:

Yeah. Okay. So someone else. Oh, Anna Lena wrote, there's so many good words of wisdom. I've been feeling so stuck, and your podcast made me embrace the change in my life. You do everything so well, Kim Hart. Now I see. It's all mentality.

Zac:

This is why I read this one, Kim, and I loved your input, Zac.

Kim:

You have brilliant input.

Zac:

Can I just say, before you respond to this, I just want to say at this point, we have enough people that listen to the show and watch the show. There must be at least a handful of people that watch it for me. And I just, like, you know, that's really tweaking my ego, so thank you.

Kim:

But do you know why I had you do it?

Zac:

Why? I actually don't know.

Kim:

Do you not know? Really? You have no idea?

Zac:

I really don't. I really don't. I have no idea why you. Cause, Kim, you know, going back to the beginning of the show and going. Pulling back the curtain, I. When we talked initially about doing the podcast, it wasn't. I wasn't like, you know, let's do a podcast together. And I want to be on it with you, but you sort of insisted that I be on it with you.

Zac:

And I. You've never. We've never really talked about why, for.

Kim:

That very reason that we got that comment, hun. There are people out there that connect with you. That's my whole point to everybody. Oh, Lord. We are not an island to ourselves. That's why I have Amy on QVC with me. That's why I have my sister and brother. People.

Kim:

We are. We need each other. And there are people, Zac, that will watch the podcast that be like, you know, Kim gets on my last nerve, but that's Zac. And my goal is not to be.

Zac:

I know about that.

Kim:

Yeah, sure. Come on. Think about it. But that. My point of doing the podcast is not to be like, I have spoken, and it's about perspective and connection. I don't. I don't. Y'all, half the time, I don't know my butt from hauling around.

Kim:

I want you to feel like there's people in your corner, and whether it's me or Zac or Amy or your whomever, because, you know, you've got something ahead of you, you've got something to do, you've got something to say. You've got a purpose. And for the love of God and all that is holy, get busy about it. Time is running out, people. Yeah, we're here for a blip.

Zac:

Listen to this one.

Kim:

That's preaching to see. That's the preaching, Kim.

Zac:

That's the. That's preach, Kim. This person wrote, this is Lynette fix 5311 wrote, I have a disability. I give it to God. It's his plan for my life. I've met so many wonderful people. Because of this disability, I now get to stay home and sew on my sewing machine and make gorgeous bags and quilts. Thank you.

Zac:

Kim and Zac love you.

Kim:

Well, first of all, I want to see them bags and quilts, because, you know, I love the textile. So you better hit us up with one of those bags and quilts, and we'll, um. Yeah, that's got to be hard.

Zac:

But that's, to me, like, isn't that. That's so powerful. It's like, look, I. It's exactly what you said. You're embracing it. You're embracing what you've been given, and you're making it something that is really powerful for yourself.

Kim:

Yeah. And I bet if she was on the podcast, she would say, and it's not every day, all day that I feel that way.

Zac:

Right.

Kim:

But it is a choice. It is a choice. I had somebody come up to me not too long ago and said they lost over, I think, 80 pounds because they said they heard our podcast about just making a decision to decide to lose weight. And, I mean, I've been criticized for that, too. People are like, that's. I'm like, well, how many diets you been on, boo boo kitty? Well, five or six. I'm like, well, okay, well, clearly that's not a magic diet. Cause that didn't work for you.

Kim:

But it's a mentality. She's right. That comment that she. It's a mentality. It's deciding to. You know, it's deciding to go with it in knowing in your soul that all things work together for the good. And they do. They really do, because, you know, when you're chaotic and you're scratching and you're clawing and you're fussing and you're cussing and you're complaining, and I'm speaking to myself here, and you're doing all that.

Kim:

You miss it. You miss things that are happening, but don't miss things.

Zac:

But. But let's go back to the beginning for a second or toward the beginning, you're kind of like. You describe yourself as being chaotic, like, you seek out the calm people because you're all over the place. Right. I. You're kind of a chaos. Like, you live in chaos to some extent. Is that.

Kim:

Yeah. But in full disclosure, and to my defense, I have two teenage boys and a husband, so some of that is not, on my own doing.

Zac:

Right, right. But this is like, you could slow down. You could make it easier on yourself.

Kim:

Never slow down.

Zac:

You could be someone that said, you know, don't you slow down. I have the successful line on QVC. I'm not gonna do anything else. I'm gonna. You know what? I know, but you're.

Kim:

Don't you slow down.

Zac:

You're expanding. You're making new episodes.

Kim:

Like, you know, don't you slow down. Why would you slow down? All of you listening? You, too. Slow as it is. Pick it up. Come on. But.

Zac:

Okay, but that. Doesn't that go against what you were saying? It's like. No, the time when, you know, you're on God's time, and it depends on when. Yeah, you know, things.

Kim:

You're on God's time when. When the time comes for him to elevate. Elevate and promote, he'll do it. But in the meantime, he puts you here to work. Don't slow down. Say yes. Say yes to speaking at church, honey. Say yes to making your quilts and your bags.

Kim:

Say yes to volunteering at your son's school. Say yes to doing a podcast. Say yes to writing a book. I don't have time. Figure it out. Say yes. You're saying no too much.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

You're saying no. Don't. Don't focus on what you can't do, what you don't have, or what you. What you wish you had. Focus on what you can do. Say yes to the things that come to you. You said, kim, I can't say yes to everything. Well, you know, things will fall out.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

We don't have a. We don't have a society of people overachieving right now, especially a younger generation. I'm just saying to you, what else? You go. I say this to Amy. She called me the other day. She called my son. She was. I'm losing.

Kim:

I mean, she was like, I don't have a life, okay? I said. I said, well, what else you gonna do? You're running these companies. You're killing it in life. You've got a dog, you've got a house, you've got a car.

Zac:

How does Amy, though? That's the thing, right? You were saying, like, everything can be a burden if you look at it that way, right?

Kim:

Yeah. We get to go and eat Mexico with cheese dip and jalapenos. What more do you want? And she said, well, I don't have to do this. I said, we're gonna hire you somebody to help you, right? Go get help. Fix it. But don't stop. You don't stop when you're killing it. You don't go, you know what? I've just.

Kim:

I've had enough. I just can't. I'm like, no, no, no. This won't last forever. You won't be in the. You won't be in the health you are right now, forever. You won't have that vitality that you. That that drive that you.

Kim:

That you have right now forever, you won't have. Have the free time that you have right now forever. You won't have those kids at home that you have right now forever. So, so, so what you've got now, do it. Say yes to it.

Zac:

And, you know, I saw such a great quote online or on TikTok or some dumb place. Was something along the lines of, how much money would you give to, you know, go back in time? Ten years, 20 years? Like, you know, we're all trying so hard to, like, make money and get, you know, get rich and, you know, be successful and all of that, but it's really like, if you had to trade 20 years of your life for whatever it is, you know, a million dollars, would you really do it? If it was the other direction, wouldn't you give a million dollars to go back?

Kim:

Yeah.

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

Knowing what you know now. Sure.

Zac:

Knowing what you well, especially knowing what you know now well. And that goes back, like, let's go full circle for a second. So, Kim, I won't say it. I'll let you say it. What is coming next for you? Give us a hint.

Kim:

Well, I mean, Amy and I were just, like I said, having this conversation the other day because we have our apparel line, we have our beauty line, and I've just recently I dipped my toe in the holiday, you know, Christmas decor. And then I was so blessed to have such a great, positive response from it.

Zac:

People seem to love it, based on the emails I saw. Yeah, they're great.

Kim:

It's. It's really. I'm really proud of it. And holiday is so, like, I'm. It's October. I'm already putting up my trees. Okay, people. I mean, the struggle is, like, my.

Kim:

And I put up eleven, not ten, not 911. Okay? So I decorate everywhere from the bathrooms to the hallways to my kids rooms. And they're just like, oh, Lord. But anyway, so they ask us to go, I'm gonna do a full on, like, textiles and home decor. And. And I thought my team was going to just be like. I mean, they started ticking. I mean, they had little ticks.

Kim:

And I was like, they said, how are we going to do this? I said, I don't know, but we're doing it. And that's where Amy was on the overload the other day on the call. And the thing is, is that I'm not passing the opportunity up because I see the obstacles ahead. I'm going to see it as an opportunity and get help because. Just because you are at a place where. And you need to change that, Zac. Because I'm not 54. I'm 53.

Kim:

Get it right. He just typed. He said, is it just because you're 54? No, it's not because I'm 54.

Zac:

I wrote in the script. I have a script I write to Kim, and I wrote in the script just because I'm 54. And now I am fired. So I'll see you later. Episode over. I just aged Kim by a year anyway.

Kim:

Who cares?

Zac:

Isn't the message that it doesn't matter, Kim?

Kim:

We're gonna take every year we can. Okay. I'm just gonna keep it close to the vest. No, but I say all that to say. Of course, I'm kidding. I just. I want. I don't.

Kim:

I just. I don't want to miss any opportunity and what a blessing it is to be able to do it. And if it goes, it goes. If it doesn't, it doesn't. Is gonna go. But I'm just saying, like, we just can't say no to it. And it's scary and it's fearful and it's exhausting. But again, what else you gonna do?

Zac:

Yeah.

Kim:

So there's something in you. You're listening to me right now, and there's something in you they've been putting off or you've wanted to do your whole life, or you've just had an inkling about, or whatever it is, say yes to it and do it. But there's always. And I'm gonna tell you something. The more you say yes to, the more opportunities come. I always say this. I say this. My son in sports, his basketball, I'd say it to playing in tennis.

Kim:

You know, God's not looking for the best. You're not looking for the most talented, because if that's the case, I'm screwed. What he's always looking for is the willing vessel. Are you willing to say, you know what? I'll do it. Remember, remember we had our CIA agent, and she said, hands up, I'll do it.

Zac:

Hands up. Yeah.

Kim:

That's all he's looking for. He's. He's looking for you to put your hand up and go, yeah, send me. I'll do it. He don't need the best. All he needs is your little five loaves and your little two fish. He don't need the whole meal. And he'll take that five loaves and two fish, and he'll make it a buffet.

Kim:

And all you can eat, too. You don't have to be fully prepared. You are prepared. You have the experience. You have that lived experience. You don't need the education. You don't need the degree.

Kim:

Unless you're a doctor or something like that. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying. But, like, to do what you want to do. You have the experience, and it's never too late. You're right on time.

Zac:

Kim's advocating for unlicensed medical practices.

Kim:

No, never. Never. Although I have googled a time or two. My dad is really bad about that right now with googling and self diagnosing. I'm like, dad, it's indigestion, okay? You've got heartburn. My toes rotten off, Kim. I've got gangrene. I'm like, no, you don't.

Zac:

No, you don't.

Kim:

Heartburn. That is black dirt from when you were out in the yard working. Okay?

Zac:

That's hilarious.

Kim:

It's true. Like, you need to wash your feet.

Zac:

Let's wrap this up, Kim. Take it home, baby. Take it home.

Kim:

Listen, y'all, this. This was. I love your comment. Please. Comment. Nothing. Nothing is ever, you know, off limits with us. Cause, look, I love what you say.

Kim:

I appreciate your constructive criticism. I appreciate your compliments. I appreciate your connection. My sole purpose for any show that we ever do is to point you to a place of purpose, is to never let you forget. It ain't about me. It's not about Zac. It's not about this show. It's about.

Kim:

What are you going to say yes to now? Okay, just take this little bit of time for yourself and be a little bit selfish. It's okay. Trust me. I bet you everybody listening gives way more than they ever get back in return. So make this moment a moment for you to think about. What do I really want? What do I want to be when I grow up? What is my place of purpose? Because I'm here to tell you, as a flawed, broken person who is so blessed to be able to talk to you and you even listen to anything Zac and I have to say. Clearly, he doesn't get to say enough because I interrupt him. But anyway, I say this to say, we love you and we appreciate you.

Kim:

And if we can help you find your place of purpose, let us know in the comments. Email us or call us, reach out to us, because we want to hear from you. Right, Zac?

Zac:

Yeah. And go to our website, kimgravelshow.com. if you're not on a platform that allows comments, a lot of you aren't. You're on QVC or on audio platforms. Send us a message. Leave us a voicemail. We'd love to hear from you.

Kim:

You know, I was just on Jennie Garth's podcast yesterday, and I talked a little. I talked her hair off. I mean, I talked to her, you know, to death, and she's an introvert. I said, jenny, you gonna talk? You got to say something. I'll talk your ear off. And can I give him a sneak peek of something, Zac?

Zac:

Yeah, of course.

Kim:

We've got candy coming out soon, so you need to stay tuned. Full on food.

Zac:

Okay. It's coming soon. We're working out quick.

Kim:

I'm making. I'm making Zac eat candy. Yeah, it's gonna be good, too.

Kim:

The Kim Gravel Show is produced and edited by Zac Miller at Uncommon audio. Our associate producer is Kathleen Grant from the Brunette Exec. Production help from Emily Bredin and Sara Noto. Our cover art is designed by Sanaz Huber at Memarian Creative. Our show is edited by Mike Kligerman. Our guest intros are performed by Roxy Reese. Our guest booking is done by Central Talent booking, and I want to give a special thank you to the entire team at QVC, and thanks to you for making this community so strong. Listen, tell somebody about the show and leave us a five star review. And make sure you're following the Kim Gravel show on your podcast app so we can keep growing this love who you are message together. I can't do this without you.